Anxiety of Pleasing God
Stress and anxiety in serving could mean you’re doing it for approval, not for God.
"When a man's ways please the LORD, he maketh even his enemies to be at peace with him". -Proverbs 16:7
Along with this scripture, I always wanted to do what pleases God because I genuinely love Him and I recognize Him as my Father. So I sought help in religion. Through religion, I experienced anxiety stemming from feelings of inadequacy.
When the feeling of inadequacy began, I told the ministers. Their explanation felt dismissive and didn't resonate with the emotional reality I was experiencing. Instead of offering genuine understanding or support, it seemed to place blame on an external force rather than acknowledging the internal struggles.
The minister's response was, "Maybe you are not consistent, or it could be from the past decisions you made." I didn't understand how much more consistent I could be when I invested my entire day in spiritual growth. Furthermore, what could I do about my past when everything about it is said and done?
These ministers also appeared irritated by my eagerness to know and learn more. So I asked questions. I had limits on what questions I should ask or whether I should ask any at all.
I began to feel pressure, and it weighed on my shoulders. I was exhausted and confused at the same time. I was stressed.
One day, I prayed to God about how stressed I felt about serving Him. God reminded me of His Word in the Bible, which I read constantly.
1 John 5:3-5 came to mind. "For this is the love of God that we keep his commandments, and his commandments are not burdensome. For whatever is born of God overcomes the world, and this is the victory that has overcome the world-our faith."
God then spoke to me from within, saying, "Denise, you're doing enough." Suddenly, I realized my life was pleasing to God; he helped me to see that my efforts were seen. The Lord lifted the weight of anxiety, inadequacy, stress, and mental exhaustion from my body instantly. These ministers made it seem as if my ways weren't pleasing to God, but really, I wasn't pleasing to them. This explained the anxiety.
I was doing what was pleasing to God all along, but I was looking for confirmation through religion when I should have been looking to Him. I should have immediately consulted with God through prayer.
If at any time I feel anxiety or any negative emotions while serving God. I immediately address Him, so I can realign my thoughts with Him and allow Him to lighten my load. I spiritually desire to do what pleases the Lord. He knows it. I do not have to go through any physical channels to get His approval when He is a part of me.
